Entertaining
Sometimes life happens when you're making plans to enjoy it. So Avocados From Mexico came up with some ways to make the most of Cinco de Mayo, no matter where Cinco takes you.
How to Throw a Cinco de Mayo Party While Lost at Sea
Hello and welcome aboard the SS Nautilus! This is your captain speaking.
Aboard the SS Nautilus, you will find adventure. You will find your sea legs. You will find a true sailor’s heart. You will find depths of your soul you never knew existed. You will find Jimmy’s smelly socks in your bunk, because he always loses them. Don’t worry about them. Just throw them overboard!
That reminds me: safety rules. You should never actually throw things overboard. Especially not people.
Now, if my charts are correct — which, of course, they are! — we’ll be arriving at our island destination on the best day of the year: Cinco de Mayo!
As you can see, we are currently going … east. Eastish. Sort of like a north, east-south direction. You don’t have to be too precise about it. The sea will take you where she pleases!
The first thing you need to know about being lost at sea — not that we’re lost — is how to keep a happy crew. That’s why I decided to bring us ashore on May 5, so we can throw a proper Cinco de Mayo party. It’s that kind of attention to detail that makes me the best captain ever and allows me to ignore other details like the barometer and objects in our path, like that ship, which I’m sure will just go around us.
Captain’s Log
May 5, Cinco de Mayo party day: Day 144 on the SS Nautilus. Speed: 4 knots. Weather: Cloudyish. Probably fine. Sails: up. Crew is getting restive. Suspect mutiny. Some crew think we are lost. Definitely not lost. Definitely still going eastish.
Plus, who cares if we are not technically on land yet? It’s the day everyone’s been waiting for. Where there’s guacamole made from Avocados From Mexico, there’s Cinco.
And being the good captain that you are, you’ve got secret rations to get them back on your side. Here’s what you do:
- Pull out the secret rations. This is the real key to any successful boat venture of which there may possibly be no end. This is how you tell your crew, “I am your captain. I love you, you love me, and no one is mad at anyone else or in any way at fault for the current situation we’re in. Let’s have a Cinco de Mayo party and share some guacamole!”
- Point out that this is not just any guacamole. It is pineapple and cucumber guacamole. It is amazing. The avocados are ripe and no one has mutinied yet.
- Notice that you have been hiding the ingredients in a secret compartment in the bilge along with an SOS radio and flares. Toss them. Those probably won’t be useful. But the guacamole sure will be.
- Craft tiny Cinco de Mayoparty hats out of chart paper. These charts are garbage. Plus, those storm clouds are really looking nasty, so perhaps a hat will protect you from the elements while creating a festive atmosphere.
- Share the guacamole! For the crewmates with scurvy, this will be especially great because of the citrus fruits.
- Party! Look, even Ed is dancing! Sure, he is delirious, but he’s also made friends with that seagull who has been hitchhiking with us, and it really seems to have brought meaning back into his life. Everyone should try to be more like Ed.
Everyone will make it to land eventually. Until then, it’s a Cinco de Mayo party aboard the SS Nautilus. That’s not so bad, right?
Visit our recipe archive for more ideas for your Cinco de Mayo party.
We’ve got plenty more blogs to show you just how to make the most of your Cinco, no matter where Cinco takes you.
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